it’s so hard.

this evening, total lunar eclipse.  leanne sweetly made moon cakes to honor lucy’s third moon and first eclipse; after viewing the moon, lucy is in a sweet moment in the baby bjorn against leanne’s chest on the couch; and in the very next instant she wakes up startled and cries.  her cries hurt.
i was depressed when i realized we couldn’t just waltz over to the east bay to see the moon as invited by annika; i was also depressed when it was five pm and i felt glad the day would be over (lucy would go to sleep) in three hours (at eight).